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The Maddie Diaries Page 8


  It’s not too itchy, but it does get a little hot when I’m dancing. Like I’m wearing a helmet or shrink-wrap on my head.

  Under her wig, Sia is beautiful inside and out. She doesn’t want people to see her face because she doesn’t want to be famous. When we hang, we hang up the wigs. I’m one of the few people who knows what she looks like!

  “Chandelier” definitely changed my life—it made me more than just the girl from Dance Moms. It opened a lot of doors and opportunities for me. Honestly, the attention all came as a shock—I thought I was making a little video. I had no idea it would be this big. More than a billion people (I said a billion, not a million!) saw it, and it’s something like the seventeenth-most viewed video ever. Rolling Stone named it the top video of 2014.

  Suddenly I was doing interviews on national news shows and accompanying Sia on the red carpet. When we went to the Grammys, we dressed in twin tuxedos and the paparazzi were screaming, “Sia, take off your wig! Maddie, do a somersault!” Like I would do that in public? This year, I toured twenty-six cities with her on the Nostalgic for the Present tour. I performed on Ellen, the Grammys, Saturday Night Live, and Jimmy Kimmel Live (where I taught him and Guillermo “how to fly through the night and swing”). I’m told the wig and nude leotard were one of the most popular Halloween costumes in 2014—people actually went trick-or-treating dressed like me. “Chandelier” was nominated for four Grammys, and I got to be there to celebrate with Sia and perform it live with Kristen Wiig (who, for not being a dancer, was a really great dancer!). For the record, it was a total pinch-me moment. I looked out at the audience, and there were Kim and Kanye watching me. I wanted to freak out, but I kept my cool and behaved like a professional.

  Backstage, I bumped into Gwen Stefani. “Oh, hey! You’re amazing,” she told me. I looked around: You talkin’ to me? People used to stop me on the street and say, “You’re that girl from Dance Moms.” Virtually overnight it became, “You’re that girl from the ‘Chandelier’ video.”

  After “Chandelier,” we did videos for “Elastic Heart,” “Big Girls Cry,” “Cheap Thrills,” and “The Greatest.” With each one, I feel like I stretched myself a little more—when I performed “Alive” on Ellen, I had to punch my fist through a pane of glass. They’re all very physically demanding. I don’t think I’ve ever been as covered in dirt as I was for “Elastic Heart”—literally filthy. When I went home and took a shower after shooting, the water looked like mud. I’m kind of a neat freak, so after every rehearsal in the cage, I’d change my clothes and use wipes to try and clean myself up, but it didn’t help. After a while I just gave up. The more I tried to stay clean, the more they kept covering me in black smudges. Shia LaBeouf, my costar in the video, didn’t seem to mind, but then again, he’s a guy. Guys don’t mind being messy.

  Sia knows some of the emotions I have to portray in her videos are really intense, and she’ll say, “If it’s too much for you, you have to say, ‘I can’t handle it.’ ” But I’m not afraid to go for it—she’s helped me be a braver actor. I think of her as a big sister, a second mom, and my best friend; she’s family. I told my mom last week I wanted to move in and live with her in L.A. (I was only half-kidding). Sia always tells me, “If you didn’t have such a great family, I’d adopt you.” She gives me great advice. She told me that when she was younger and she was a songwriter, she got burnt out because she worked constantly. She always warns me that if all you do is work, you wind up hating something you once loved. “Be a kid,” she always tells me. “You work harder than any adult I know!”

  Before I met her, I would say yes a lot to things I didn’t want to do because I thought I had to—I didn’t want to disappoint anyone. I’d be overwhelmed by the amount of work I had on my plate. But now, if I need a day off, I say so. Sia always tells me you have to take time off, step back, and appreciate the moment. You have to cherish the little things. When I’m with her, I laugh a lot, and anything I’m worrying about just melts away. She always tells me, “Stay humble, be grateful,” and I think that’s the best advice. She’s been through some bad times and seen a lot. Instead of letting that hold her back or weigh her down, it’s lifted her up and made her wiser. She doesn’t take a single thing for granted, and she reminds me that life is what you make of it—so you better make it the best ride you can.

  Five Things I Love, Love, Love About Sia

  1 Her crazy laugh. It’s impossible for me to imitate, but it’s kind of like, “Huh-HAH!” She also giggles a lot.

  2 Going to movies and out for sushi with her. She wrote the music for Zootopia and we went to see it together. When we go out, people recognize me and not her, because she’s not wearing the wig. Someone even asked me, “Is this your mom?”

  3 Being part of her family—she took me to a wedding recently with her and her hubby in Philly. People call me her “muse” or her “protégé,” but she calls me her BFF.

  4 Her amazing doggies, Cereal, Pantera, and Lickey. They are like my family, too.

  5 She’s so normal. Even though she’s this humungous superstar, she’s the most regular person you’ll ever meet. She’s the opposite of a diva!

  On Tour With Sia

  October 15, 2016: As I’m writing this, we have thirteen more concerts left to go on the tour—which means we’re halfway through. I can’t even think about that, because it makes me so sad. I am loving every minute of this experience, and I don’t want it to ever end. So I won’t keep track of how many cities we already logged or how many more we have to go. I’m just trying to live in the moment and pretend there’s no end date.

  We did the West Coast lap of the tour and now we’re heading east—Boston; Washington, DC; and New York; and all over Canada as well. Then we head south to Florida, Georgia, New Orleans, and Texas. We travel everywhere on the bus, which is more like a home on wheels. It’s huge and outfitted with everything you can think of, from TVs, fridges, and couches to bunk beds. I’m on the top bunk and my mom sleeps on the bottom—we’re tour buddies, and I’d be a lot more homesick if she wasn’t here with me. She puts her arms up sometimes because she’s afraid I’ll fall out of the top bunk! I have my own dressing room at each venue, but I never use it—I like to hang with the dancers. Instead, my mom camps out in there and makes it her own.

  We’ve literally been on the road for the past fifteen hours, driving from Chicago to Boston, and I can’t say I’m bored. Sia surprised me with a professional massage yesterday, and that was an amazing treat (my legs and feet get really sore from all the dancing). I’m rewatching Gossip Girl on Netflix with Tonya (my tour BFF and hair/makeup stylist). I also slept really late this morning—till about eleven thirty. I woke up and it was already lunchtime. You can’t blame me: We didn’t get to bed till 3 a.m. because the concert doesn’t end till midnight, and then we have to pack everything up. So yeah, I needed to catch up on my sleep. I feel like everyone on this tour is family—even Tonya’s dog, who makes the smelliest farts and stinks up the bus, lol! Occasionally, we have a day off to go shopping or go out to eat as a group, but mostly we just go from venue to venue, city to city, performing for the fans.

  The stadium crowds are ginormous—you look out, and it’s a sea of faces, thousands and thousands of them. I always get nervous, which I know sounds crazy, because I should be used to doing the shows now. But it’s a total rush. We do sixteen numbers total, and I dance in six or seven of them. Stephanie Mincone is like my twin; she does the other half of the dances in the same wigs and nude leotard, because it’s just too much for one person to do. We look so much alike, people actually think it’s me up there for the whole concert. Wanna tell us apart? She’s a little more muscular than I am, and I’m a little taller. And she’s the one who gets to wear the panda head, FYI, in “Titanium.” Steph’s become one of my best friends and we got so close on tour; she’s literally my other half. We think the same, we talk the same, and I love her so much—she’s my favorite person. I used to go to her hotel room and watch RuPaul�
�s Drag Race with her—the boys on tour, Nick and Wyatt, got us hooked on it. All four of us would watch it in the dressing room, and Floris, the other male dancer, would say, “Can we please watch something else?” Wyatt and I were duo buddies; he brought his Wii on the bus and we played Mario Kart and the boys would always beat me. Nick was the first male dancer they cast in the show and he made sure we were on time because he was “the responsible one.” Floris was a big brother to me—he was always asking me, “Did you eat? Did you drink?” before a show. He was always looking out for me.

  When the tour came to an end, it was so hard for us to say goodbye; we were bawling. I kept saying, “I can’t believe we’re all leaving each other.” We were a tight-knit little family. But the good news is we’ll be doing it again one day—Sia has promised this isn’t the end. She said we will always be her family.

  The first song I dance to is “Alive,” and the audience screams when I come out. Sia is singing, and these dancers in white ruffled costumes make up the layers of her skirt. Suddenly, they back off and it’s my big reveal. Then it’s just me and Sia onstage, and it’s real and surreal at the same time.

  Celebs sometimes surprise us and come meet us backstage. I don’t really get starstruck very often, but Jennifer Aniston came the other day and I was so excited to meet her. She’s one of my acting idols, and she said she was super inspired by the show. We talked for a while and she is so sweet and genuine and I look up to her a lot.

  I think I was walking on air that night when I climbed back on the bus. Most of the time I’m so tired, my head hits the pillow and I’m out like a light. It’s like you’re so pumped up, so full of energy and anticipation . . . and then the show ends and your battery runs out. I need to recharge! But onstage, there’s no feeling like it in the world. Sia says, “This is where you were meant to be,” and I know she’s right.

  I spent my fourteenth birthday on the tour. We were in San Francisco at the time, and Sia surprised me by taking our whole gang to a bakery to decorate cakes. When we were done, we all went out for sushi—which is my favorite food. She knows me so well! Tonya also gave me the best gift that night: She held up her phone, and on it was a video from Zac Efron wishing me a happy birthday! I don’t know how she did it, but she did. I was crying, I was so excited. Cake, sushi, Zac . . . what more could a girl ask for?

  Memories of Maddie

  “I first met Maddie at one of our rehearsals for Sia back in February of 2016. We jumped right into work and learning choreography. I was blown away by her work ethic and talent, but also by how sweet and humble she was. Not to mention, her professionalism and maturity are admirable. When we first met, we were both the same height, and now she’s at least three inches taller than me! She’s my big little sister.

  “Maddie and I have shared endless laughs in our times spent together on the Nostalgic for the Present tour. We always joke around and say that we’re twins, because it’s scary how similar our personalities and sense of humors are. One of my favorite memories with Maddie has to be when we had a slumber party in my hotel room in Las Vegas. The night consisted of multiple episodes of Project Runway, jumping on the bed, room service, and good ol’ girl talk. That same night, we had also given each other blindfolded makeovers—I’m sure you could imagine how those turned out. While on tour we binge-watched RuPaul’s Drag Race and finished three seasons. It became a preshow ritual. Any time I spend with Maddie is my favorite time and is always filled with laughs and love.

  “Spending so much time with Maddie the past couple months, I feel like I’ve really gotten to learn a lot about her and grow a true sisterly bond with her. She’s one of the most caring and genuine people I’ve ever met. She’s always concerned with other people’s well-being and happiness. I don’t think I’ve seen her interact with someone and not bring joy to the conversation or a smile to their face. She’s a total goof with a heart of pure gold. She’s humble and down-to-earth. There’s not many other ways to put it, other than that she is an extremely special girl. Even though I’m six years older than her, I’m so inspired by her, and she’s taught me more than she knows.”

  —Stephanie Mincone, dancer, Sia’s Nostalgic for the Present tour (and Maddie’s “twin”)

  Dear Maddie

  My mom and dad just told me they’re getting a divorce. I’m really freaking out—I feel like we won’t be a family anymore and it’s all my fault.

  First of all, it’s not your fault. Your parents don’t think that and you shouldn’t either. Their relationship just isn’t working the way it was and they don’t want to be unhappy. When my mom and dad divorced, I was upset at first. But I can truly tell you it’s not the end of the world. I thought it would be, but then I realized it was way better, because now I didn’t have to worry about them fighting or being in a horrible mood. They will always be a part of your life and always love you, even if they’re not together. And for me, the good news was I got two Christmases! Be really honest with your parents about what you’re feeling—tell them if you’re sad or freaking out. They will help you through this like mine did. And just know that you’re not alone—tons of kids have divorced moms and dads, and we all felt like you did when we first found out. It gets better, I promise.

  My friend asked me to do her homework for her—she’s really busy with dance class and doesn’t have time. I feel like it’s cheating, but if I don’t do it, I’m worried she won’t like me anymore.

  It is cheating. And you’re not doing her any favors. She’ll never learn unless she does her assignments on her own. My advice would be to tell her you will sit with her and help her with her homework if she doesn’t understand it, but you’re not going to give her the answers. Explain that you care about her, and helping her cheat is not being a good friend. If she’s your friend, she’ll understand. If she doesn’t like you anymore, then she was probably using you all along and you’re better off without her.

  Do you ever get freaked out that you’re famous—like when someone asks you for your autograph? Do you ever want to cover your face like Sia?

  Well, sometimes it’s a little overwhelming, I’ll be honest with you. Like when I’m just trying to walk around and be with friends and someone runs up to me and sticks their camera in my face and says, “Take a picture with me!” Sometimes people are rude and don’t even say hi, they just demand a selfie! But for the most part, fans are really sweet and polite and I don’t mind. I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for everyone out there supporting me and following me. I realize that I chose this life and this career, and that’s kind of all part of it. I’m not gonna complain—I owe my fans so much.

  Today Is a Beautiful Day to . . .

  Get inspired. Research and read about someone who you think is a great role model—a person in history, a celeb, an icon, etc. Make a list of three important things they say/believe that you can use to make your own life greater. Sia is obviously someone I really look up to, but I also am inspired by celebs with great style—like Kendall Jenner, Ariana Grande, Selena. Those girls always look good!

  Chill. Take a yoga class; go for some pampering at a mani/pedi place; take a few deep breaths and let the tension drain away. Here’s another funny way to relax: Yawn! Someone told me that it actually lifts your mood and helps you think clearer. Just cover your mouth when you do—my mom always says it’s not polite to yawn in someone’s face!

  Whip up some jewelry. This was something Kenzie and I used to love to do, especially with beads or rainbow-colored rubber bands. I love finding jewelry how-tos on YouTube that look fun to make. Stock up on supplies like wire, beads, clasps, etc. at a craft store. That way, the next time you’re twiddling your thumbs and complaining you have nothing to do, you’ll be ready. An added bonus (besides fighting off boredom): You’ll have an instant new accessory to show for it!

  After all those years of being judged at dance competitions—some where they actually make you stand up there and smile while they pick apart every single thing you did wrong�
�the idea of being a judge on So You Think You Can Dance: The Next Generation sounded so cool. But the other judges? Well, they’re huge. Legends, to be exact. Paula Abdul is tiny, but she has had this big career as a singer, dancer, actress, and choreographer (she actually choreographed Janet Jackson’s videos, which is crazy!). I’m not sure there’s anything the woman hasn’t done. I became really close to her because she and I were the girls of the group. She’s so silly and fun, and we always agreed when it came to judging. I call Nigel Lythgoe “Papa Nigel”—he’s been a dancer, choreographer, director, and producer and judged a gazillion shows. Everyone in the dance world knows his name and he’s practically royalty. And Jason Derulo—well, he’s sold millions of singles including some of my faves, “Wiggle” and “Talk Dirty.” He’s the coolest person on the planet, period.

  Then there’s me. I’m someone closer to the age of the competitors and just starting out in my career. My résumé is nowhere near as long as my fellow judges’, and I’ve grown up watching the show and looking up to the dancers my whole life. When they first approached me I was in shock—I thought they wanted me for a guest judge spot, a onetime thing. “You want me to be on the show the whole time?” I gasped. “That’s insane.” I felt a little out of my league the first day I took my seat with the other judges. But the self-doubt quickly melted away as soon as I realized I did have a lot to bring to the table (literally, lol!). The first few shows I was nervous, so my comments were a little basic: “You guys did a great job!” But as we got further along, I definitely felt more confident speaking in front of a live audience. I wanted to give each dancer something they could take away with them to help them improve; I watched carefully and gave them a few pointers that would create a stronger performance.